A Guide to Survival when Facebook is down!

Scrolling to find the end of the Social Media timeline?
Wasting time trying to find the pot of gold at the end of the social media rainbow

Are you sitting in front of your screen, hand trembling as you futilely reload again and again? As you’re clutching your phone, thumb scrolling with wild desperation through a blank screen, an unfathomable void where the comforting bluish hue of Facebook once lived? We feel you. We’re right there with you in this unprecedented, screen-illuminating tragedy that is the Great Facebook Blackout of today.

Downdetector is reporting Facebook outages in Canada. It is not however the end of civilization – maybe just civilization as you have come to see it!

The outage is impacting desktop and laptop computers, not apparently smartphones. So it is not a full-blown time for panic.

“No Facebook? How About a Look in the Real Book of Life?”

News Flash! The world existed pre-Facebook. There’s a wealth of life out there without cute cat memes, viral dance challenges, and vaguely political rants from Uncle Fred. So, strap on your explorer’s hat and prepare to rediscover the physical world! It’s like VR but with 100% more texture.

“Revive the Art of Small Talk or, Gasp, Deep Conversation?”

Remember when people used to speak to each other face-to-face? Shocking, we know! Why not strike up a conversation with your local barista or, even better, that other person in your house who claims to be related to you?

“There’s More to the Internet than Facebook – Yes, Really!”

Is your homepage not loading? Try typing a new address into your browser. There’s a rich tapestry of websites available: read a novel on Project Gutenberg, explore the universe with NASA, or check the news from other platforms. It’s time to diversify your digital portfolio.

“Actual Physical Activity – Not Just for Avatars Anymore!”

Remember the term ‘outdoors’? It’s like your living room but bigger, with better lighting. Give it a whirl. You might discover a newfound love for frisbee, jogging, or that thing called walking.

“Throw a ‘Facebook is Down’ Party – ‘Cause Why Not?”

Rumor has it, people used to gather together, talk, dance, eat, and have a grand ol’ time. Try it out. Play charades, exchange ‘remember when’ stories, or get creative in the kitchen together. And remember, no posts means no judgement!

“The Forgotten Art of Self-Reflection”

Instead of crafting the perfect witty status update, take a moment for introspection. What are your dreams, your hopes, your fears? Oh, you were just going to post a picture of your breakfast? Well, you can reflect on that too!

In conclusion, if the Great Facebook Blackout of today has you spiralling into despair, fear not. Your Facebook-less existence can be not just bearable, but exciting and fulfilling. Who knows, you might even realize that there’s more to life than likes, shares, and comments. Stay strong, fellow netizens, we can survive this together. And remember, it’s not the end of the world. That’s still scheduled for when Twitter goes down.

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