Always live in the present moment, the now. Be who you are as a person and forget everything else.
Let go of all excuses, negative beliefs, expectations, doubts, blame, bad thoughts, worries, fears, depending on things outside of you to make you happy, or constantly trying to please people or seek approval from others….if we still use these old beliefs and ideas, means were not letting go. We’re resisting and holding these thoughts, that immoblize us from the now, or to move on in our lives. These negative thoughts keep us stuck, and they expand & extend emotional turmoil. Behind every thought is an emotion. You don’t have to believe these ideas or negative thoughts.
For example. Idealization. Is a certain idea, belief, excuses, expectation, etc; and if we use this future expectation. this idea & belief. This co-dependending attitude. That the future will be so much different then the present. Like if I had got that, I would be happy. If I had her or him, I would be happy. If this event or special occasion happen turn out the way I wanted it, I would be happy. Hey! Expecting things outside of ourselves don’t bring happiness. Waiting or expecting it doesn’t make happiness either…Happiness isn’t going to show up at your doorstep and say “Hey, ‘Im Life…im everything you need & expect.”
The second thing is Frustration. First comes Idealization, then comes frustration. Then when you have high expectations, and your future expections are never met…you get frustrated or throw a tantrum. Expecting a person you love to change or meet your expectations, but when him or her doesn’t turn out the way you want. You throw a tantrum about it…you can’t change the way they are. A special occasion comes up, and you have an idea its going to turn out the way you want…but when it doesn’t. You complain & point out the flaws.
After frustration is Demoralization. Meaning after you dont get what you expected to get, comes dissapointment. Or fall into depression, guilt, selfblame.Then one day snapping into a rage, and then afterwards…This cycle of Idealization, Frustration, & Demoralization keeps going & going. Get outta there! If you want a solution.
JUST be you, be in the present, just let go of everything & lower down your expectations. Don’t believe in “Oh the future is going to better then whats happening now,” newflash. The Future is right now. Concentrate on the now. Take for an example…when you see a child. what do you see? The kids playing and running around, not having a care in the World, doing what he or she wants to do, and not stopping to think negatively… Showing heart and happiness within. Thats how we must live right now. In the present.
Who cares what you don’t have. Or expectations. Be grateful for what you do have… if you have a goal, dream, a place when want to go to. Instead of striving to it with aggressive ambition & anger. Imagine your’re there right now. Live the future right now. ..then putting goals & dreams way ahead of you. Enjoy the present moment. Good or bad. Enjoy every bit of part of the journey to that goal. Put your own heart into it.
Even if your’re not doing anything meaningful in your life, it doesn’t define who are. Enjoy the moment anyways. Or if you have a great job, dont believe in the term “You are what you do.” What if you lost your job? Then who are you underneath your job?
Accept who you are as a person. Even right now…don’t believe you’ll only be better in the future, or if the futures going to be better then the present. Don’t believe in the negative thoughts, beliefs, excuses, etc; Because they immoblized you from enjoying every moment in your life. Let go and give up believing those old thinking patterns & excuses, doubts, intellectualism, authoritarianism etc; and just do whatever comes from within you!
Don’t live in the past or the future, because we can’t control or expect anything from both of them. it’s unpredictable. Just leave it be. You don’t want to end up like Ashton Kutcher in the Butterfly Effect. If you catch my drift?
P.S If you read Dr.Wayne Dyer’s books or seen his tv shows, you’ll know what I’m talking about.